BuilderMaster LTD. Presents:

DimensionBuilderMaster 8000000!

(Use at the risk of yourself and the dimension in which the machine resides. Dimension may be spontaneously destroyed upon use of the machine. Terms and conditions apply. This product comes with absolutely NO warranty, not even the implied warranty of merchantability or fitness for a particular purpose. This product comes as-is, and no refunds will be provided for any reason. (you may request a replacement if necessary at no extra charge to you) Colors vary. Be wary of some clone machines which look only slightly different but serve a very different, much more destructive function. Or they are just much more likely to destroy your dimension and a random neighboring one when you attempt to use it. This machine does not actually build dimensions; it only lets you create DimensionAccessMaster 400000 machines of various sorts to travel to these dimensions. It also builds an End Portal, if you really want to see that... creepy... dra- Ahhhhh! I can't say it!)

Resting on your beautiful calcite pedestal, the pedestal condemned by your builder for no known reason, you appear to shine (even if emission of light is a symptom of an extremely dangerous defect which could result in destruction of most of the Multiverse upon use...) in your glamour and beauty, though you're mostly a pile of rock. Makes you sturdy, I suppose. Are you messing with my poetry? Yes? Ye- Ow! Stop that! What are you doing? Help!!! It-

End of transmission

Received by the Cave Foundation for archival purposes

Transmission number 32159; Archive ID: 54678; How many times Cave Foundation staff members have tried to fake their death "for dramatic purposes" so far, including this transmission: 59427